Friday, August 15, 2014

Nerdicus NES Review #124: Championship Bowling

Title : Championship Bowling

Publisher : Romstar / Athena

Developer : Athena

Genre : Bowling

Players : 1-4 Players

Release Date : 1989

Estimated Value (as of today's date) : $2-$4

One thing this game DID get right was the portrayal of a 1980's bowler. Come on. That box art is absolutely perfect. The v neck shirt exposing the tufts of professional chest hair. The perfect pornstache. Those white slacks, and perfect positioning. I am upset however they did not include the bowling brace. I feel like that is what REALLY makes a bowler a bowler.

Sorry, I'm making fun of bowling. Probably because I suck at it. Me putting spin on the ball is just asking for the ball to fling into my neighbors lane and decapitate him. Give me those bumpers! Yeah! Six year old birthday parties! many nightmares.
Anyway, here we have Championship Bowling for the NES. Can't really do much with this here. It's a bowling simulator. On the NES. At least it can support up to four players, so if you don't have enough money to afford a $5 game of bowling, you can always invite your friends over to PRETEND you can score a 300.

I'd much rather play the Wii version, but it looks like I'm stuck with this for now.

No, you aren't seeing things. That's a penguin on the title screen. Not sure why.....I guess penguins are an integral part of bowling. And I swear, I thought that girl on the right was giving me the finger when I first loaded up this game.

If you don't have a clue what bowling is, I guess I'll explain it to you. You take a big heavy ball, you throw it down a wooden lane, and you knock down pins. Knock 'em all down, and that's good! Miss 'em, and that's bad. Got it? Good, okay.

The game actually does an interesting job of integrating a few factors such as ball weight, handed-ness, spin, and power which can affect your bowl. I actually like this, as it doesn't make the game straightforward. You have to think. And for a bowling game, that's surprising.

This may sound like a rushed review, but there's not much I can say about bowling. The controls are pretty decent, and once you get the hang of the ball weight, control, and power you'll be flinging strikes at a pretty consistent rate. In fact, I think I found some spot right between the two last dots where you can spin it and almost ALWAYS get a strike. There seem to always be tricks like that in old sport games.

Visually, I was expecting a lot less from a bowling game, but it looks good! And the've never been so pumped up to bowl. Better than the crap they play at bowling alleys.

So that's about it. A bowling game. For the NES. That's good. Case closed. Too bad I hate bowling.

Time to grow my pornstache.

Final Score (out of 5) :

Until next time. Keep on gaming!



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